Welcome to the Conversation, Christian

Silver lining on the silver spoon

Jacob’s brothers meant him ill when they sold him into bondage. God meant it for good, said the former slave. Let me offer a similar sentiment about the recent events in Thomas Jefferson’s former hometown, Charlottesville, Virginia. There has been a great revival among Christians to disavow themselves of anything that resembles racism and publically condemn all people who resemble a racist. Following the great Manhattan reformer Timothy Keller, the Christian army has mustered for a social media roll call. I would like to joyfully present y’all my heartfelt welcome to the conversation, Christian!

Please sit your skinny jeans and flip flops on the “Georgia clay”. We’ve saved you a spot.

Enough is enough!

It seems that the latest violent manifestation of racial tensions had the suitable amount of carnage to finally goad many of you good folks to engage the culture. Although you have been steadfast and resolute to remain tongue-tied on other issues that render the Imago Dei as collateral damage, your lack of zeal is instructive. It seems that our positions on those issues only had the potential to offend.

But now, the death of one protester and two Virginia State Troopers are the straw that broke the camel’s back. It’s time to say “no” to the excuses and the “I told you so’s” and show rest of the world (or at least the ones on Facebook) that we won’t stand…ahem, for racism.

Ex uno plures et mortem

Why argue to stop doctors and mothers who kill their unborn children? I know that 60 million people have been murdered in the United States since the Roe SCOTUS ruling. I realize that the progressive position that unborn human persons are mere globs of DNA is a direct and fatal attack on our belief that ALL people are made in God’s image. It’s common knowledge that Planned Parenthood was began by Margaret Sanger to exterminate African decedents in America and that it is at its core an attack on black people. I know that since 1973 abortion has reduced the black population by over 25%.

That’s beside the point. There are victims to consider on both sides, victims who have been coerced by cultural conditions and oppressed by male hierarchal financial slavery. We must walk softly on their feelings. Forgive me and other Christians if we’ve been too bold on that issue. I can now see that our apologetic should have considered those social justice issues primary.

We marginalized when we prioritized. Triage is just another word for discrimination.

“From the beginning” (we were wrong)

Oh, and the cultural redefinition of marriage, it’s now “the law of the land”. So, I apologize for bringing it up. But, I now see that if we’d petitioned the culture en masse, that we would have simply alienated people who need the grace of Christ. Although many of these folks chastised us (and Jesus) for covenantal exclusivity, it was obviously right to wait them out. I realize that God intended that marriage would be between one man and one woman but an insistence on that protection of “family values and moral virtues” was oppressive. I now understand why you simply stood by and said nothing and allowed our culture to be convinced that marriage was merely about love. Because that’s what life is about.

If we could only get people to love one another, long term and monogamously, maybe then we’d be considered more loving. That’s what’s at stake.

I suppose that’s why most of you newly self-appointed guardians of the Imago Dei never engage African-Americans on the issue of marriage. Although the birth rate to unmarried mothers hovers around 73% and that even African-American’s are concerned about this, it’s just too sensitive to mention. Marriage, especially when it comes to race, has been submitted to the government by the Church. Good riddance I say. It’s hotbed topic and it singles people out.

COEXIST-finally a meaningful cross in the T

Racism is another kind of sin. It is simply the kind of sin that cannot coexist in a person who “confesses Jesus as Lord and believes him to be resurrected”. Obviously, those who are wrong about race are wrong about Jesus. Their peculiar sinful nature is the kind that is unforgivable. Baby killers and practicing homosexuals are not of the same ilk. One is a propagator of sin while the latter is merely a victim of it. Thus, the distinction.

I am so glad that after months or even generations of debate on the topic of racial reconciliation, you have graced us with your condemnation and correction. We have been distracted. We appreciate your uncanny ability to help us refocus on the real attack on the Imago Dei. Now, finally with your participation, we can join hands with the culture and rid ourselves of this historical blight. We can finally replace the fish on our cars with a COEXIST bumper sticker and remain true to our principles.

Helpful hints from a hypocrite

I’d like to offer two observations, if I may. They could help us move forward in this new and most effective Christian vindication.

First, the tactic is easy. Simply condemn and repudiate any racist or act of racism “full stop”! Don’t worry about definitions or even meaningful discussions. If someone is associated with or even sympathetic to a cause, group, movement, or mantra that seems racially insensitive to you, point your finger and call them out.

That’s all there is to it. When they ask you to define racism assume that that’s racist code to escape the fact that they don’t believe that all people are made in God’s image. By the way, you can assume that that’s the case. Everyone knows that anyone who disagrees with the contemporary cultural dogma of unqualified egalitarianism makes that theological blunder. There’s no way that you can believe in the absolute application of the Imago Dei and believe that rights are limited. Rights are primary, God given, essential attributes of humans. It’s in the Bible somewhere I’m certain.

The lying and the lamb

Next, team up with the culture! They’re with us on this one.

In the past, we’ve made the mistake of engaging in the so-called culture wars. These efforts were oppressive to the rest of America. They were a displacement of Kingdom with country and a misapplication of the Gospel. Falwell, Kennedy, and Sproul caused us to spiral into a war of division with that rhetoric. We were ostracized and made a spectacle. Sometimes we’ve been persecuted and even prosecuted for standing up for God’s truth. But now we can finally stand and shout from the rooftops of our glass houses that we’ve “just about had enough”!

Now we can enjoy unity with the rest of the nation. We can truly be one nation under God because we all hate racism.

(It’s not couth in your normal progressive Christian circles that deny anything good exists in American history but now’s the time to raise your fist and say “Merica”)

A greater hate hath no one

So, be sure to share our common hatred for people that hate other people to bring unity to a greater discussion of how the grace of Christ emancipates us from the bondage of hate. They’ll be won over by this bloviating of brotherhood and surely say the sinner’s prayer or something. More importantly, because our un-nuanced ad hom apologetic so closely resembles theirs in a very vague and ambiguous way, they might begin to receive us into the culture again. Who knows? Maybe they’ll even like us.

One things for sure, they’ll stop insisting that we (our ancestors and traditions) have been integral in the creation of ideas like covenant, exclusivity, and general intolerance. They’ll eventually forget about the Crusades, the Inquisitions, and slavery. Surely they’ll stop accusing us of being a white man’s religion. They’ll quit lumping us in with the racial malcontents like they have in the past.

Maybe they’ll invite Franklin Graham to speak at Berkley or nominate Judge Roy Moore as POTUS. If we can just convince them that we’re not racists by publically and vehemently condemning the alt right, the KKK, and neo-Confederates as well as affirm LGBTQ, allow men in ladies restrooms, and sign Roe vs Wade in blood, then we might be accepted once again.

But, don’t hold your breath…

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